Have you ever put off an important project for no “good” reason?
Do you find yourself saying “I really need to focus on this”…but end up checking your email or fussing with paperwork instead?
Are you looking at projects you’ve had on your plate for months and months, with little to no progress?
My friend, I believe you are feeling resistance. This is a grand clue for you, and I invite you to delve a little deeper into why you are feeling it.
One likely scenario is fear. This could be fear of failure, fear of success or fear of exposure. We tend to stay in old habits as these are familiar “safe” places. Getting out of your comfort zone takes guts, it takes vision, and it takes motivation to gain something more.
How about a paradigm shift? Let’s say you want to create a new marketing plan, and then comes the resistance. I don’t have enough time. It won’t work. I don’t know how to do it. I’m fine where I am…but, not really.
When you feel resistance, let that trigger your mind that this is a good time to examine what is behind the resistance. Is it fear as stated above? Is it boredom? Is it not enough information? Is it pure overwhelm?
Then, take action by design – not by default.
Action by design would mean you have reflected on what you want to accomplish, where you want to go, how you want to feel, weighed all the options, decided this action gets you to a good place (the place you want to be and how you want to feel), and you decide it truly is a priority…or you ditch it. You’ve looked at why you are resisting and then made a conscious choice to overcome, because it’s what you want.
Choosing by default (which is a choice as well) means you choose the path of least resistance without careful or critical review. You feel the resistance without thinking it through, and you move to your email or another less-hard distraction.
We are all guilty of this. I can think of many projects, current and past, that I feel resistance to. It takes me stepping back to examine why I feel this way, and how I really want to feel. It can be hard to do if I’m feeling overwhelmed, but in the long-run, it pays to use my time wisely and do it. Otherwise I end up feeling like I failed, like I’m wasting my time or I am stuck.
It reminds me of the “Waiting Place” in the Dr. Seuss book “Oh, The Places You’ll Go!” Personally, I do not like that place!
Three Tips To Helping You Overcome Resistance
- Habit linking. Think of a good habit you have and then think of a new habit you want to create and do them at the same time. For example, let’s say you have a great habit of taking notes during a meeting, but your follow-up is lacking. The notes get filed (or piled, for my piling readers out there). Link your actions. As soon as the call or meeting is over, before you file your notes, review them while your memory is still fresh, create an action plan or at least an outline of an action plan, then create an “appointment” with yourself in your calendar to work on it or complete it. Viola! You will now be known as someone great at following up!
- Deadline linking. This is one I use often myself. There is something I need to do and I really don’t want to, but I know it’s important. Deadlines help me, so I purposefully create a deadline that if missed will create a more fearful outcome then the thing I’m resisting. I promise it to someone. I create a deliverable that affects someone else. I have a fear of not doing a good job, so I use this to help me move ahead.
- Reward linking. If you have a coffee date with a friend on your calendar, or some other event you are looking forward to, you can use this to help you through resistance. Decide that you MUST complete this resisted task before you see your friend. No ifs, ands or buts (as my mom would say). It can also help if you tell your friend what you have planned. A little accountability never hurt anyone!
And, remember, you want to avoid this place:
The Waiting Place excerpt from “Oh The Places You’ll Go!” By Dr. Seuss
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come,
or a plane to go or the mail to come,
or the rain to go or the phone to ring,
or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.